The Secret Places Beneath the Surface

Back when I played (and rapidly failed) Andy Holmes' Tunnels & Trolls 'mini solo adventure' The Halls of the Gorgon, I mentioned that it had a sequel, which I also own. There's no actual need to have beaten Gorgon before playing the follow-up, The Hidden Halls of Ogul-Duhr - the introduction indicates that some months have passed since the Gorgon was slain, but does not require the reader to play the adventurer who killed it. Indeed, while there is enough ambiguity to allow for reuse of such a veteran if you have one, the implication is that the player character has never been to the vicinity of the eponymous Halls.

So, I'm an adventurer, low on funds, and currently in a tavern. A stranger approaches, wishing to sell me a map that shows the way to the caves of Ogul-Duhr. When I point out that the Gorgon which inhabited them was killed a little while back, since when the place has been thoroughly looted and, according to rumour, taken over by a band of Orcs, he goes on to say that this map includes details of a secret entrance to lower levels that have yet to be plundered. This convinces me to hand over the money he wants, which suggests that my character isn't particularly smart, so I'll bring back the buffoon who survived Scandal in Stringwater. Equipping him with a sword brings his funds down to just above the cost of the map, which fits the financial set-up indicated by the text quite nicely.

As I make my way to the mountains where the caves are located, a little more information about recent developments in the area is provided. The Orcs who moved in charged treasure-seekers an entrance fee, also demanding their cut of any valuables found in the Halls, but now that the place has been (to their knowledge) comprehensively ransacked, most of them have moved on, so I may be able to get in without their knowledge and avoid having to hand over any money.

Bearing this in mind, I opt to avoid the main entrance and head straight for the secret entrance indicated on the map. Identifying its precise location may be tricky, though - indeed, it is, but not just because the map is imprecise. To find the right place, I must succeed at a Saving Roll based on the average of my Intelligence and Luck, and they add up to an odd number, while the text neglects to specify whether halves round up or down. In most circumstances, that lack of clarity wouldn't matter, but a score of exactly 10 (and the way the rules handle doubles puts the odds of that happening above 1 in 18 but below 1 in 12) could go either way depending on the rounding. 

I get a 6 and a 4. Well, way back in junior school I was taught to round halves to the even number, which in this instance means rounding up, so I narrowly succeed. I find the concealed entrance, and can go through it... or I could act as if I hadn't found it, and probably experience some bother with Orcs in an attempt to gain access to the regions no longer worth checking out. Seriously? Look, Mr. Holmes, if I wanted to not enter the 'hidden halls', I would have done so by not buying the adventure rather than going to all the bother of looking for the way in, scraping through on a tricky roll (at which I only get three tries, according to the text), and then saying, "On second thoughts, nope."

So I go through. A corridor descends into the mountain, at one point passing an opening in the floor. As I have no way of telling how deep it is, and possess no rope, I pass by the hole. The corridor leads to an archway which opens into an unpleasant-smelling chamber. I step through, and the corridor behind me caves in, as if to say, "If you're not going to use the exit option I so graciously provided, I'm going to take it away, so there!" An unsuccessful Saving Roll determines that I take a little damage from debris.

Looking around, I find that I am in a crypt, which contains many stone sarcophagi carved with figures resembling Dwarves. While the corridor by which I entered is now impassable, there is another passage leading north. The stench pervading the air could be an indicator of something undead, so I shan't loiter.

The exit leads to a T-junction, where the roll of a die could subject me to a random encounter, but on this occasion nothing troubles me. Turning east, I have to make another Saving Roll, which I fail exactly like the previous one - right down to the numbers rolled. A Rock Troll bursts through the wall, declaring its intent to kill me, and there's no real chance of my winning a straight fight against an opponent with those stats. A quick check on the capabilities of the spell replicated by my explosive brandy-snaps reveals it to be rather less effective than I'd hoped, so I have to choose between using my sword and almost certainly dying, or throwing a brandy-snap, mildly injuring the troll, and definitely dying. I'll take an infinitesimally tiny chance over zero chance, so I go for my sword... and I die anyway.

Considering the lethality of the 'suitable for starting characters' solo adventures, I find myself increasingly baffled by the existence of Tunnels & Trolls solos designed for higher-level characters.

The Monks Are Troubled and Full of Woe

Scholastic Books' second previously unpublished Fighting Fantasy book was the first 'official' FF by a new-to-the-range author since Spellbreaker. Charlie Higson, better known for The Fast Show and the Young Bond novels, joined the list of FF writers with The Gates of Death, a gamebook that does not have a particularly good reputation in fandom - indeed, more than one reviewer has labelled it the worst book in the series. I wouldn't go that far, given the existence of Blood of the Zombies, but it definitely has its problems.

I've only played it twice prior to this attempt, both times as part of the challenges I ran at the Fighting Fantazine forum earlier this decade, and while I didn't make it to the endgame, I am aware of at least some of the problems with that part of the book, as I had to make a ruling with regard to certain contradictions within the text. If on this occasion I get far enough to have to engage with the inconsistencies, I should be a little better equipped to make a judgement call, as I'll be working from the actual text rather than other people's summary of the issue.

Back in the 1980s I had ill-formed ideas for an epic FF saga ranging all over the world of Titan, the third book of which would be set in the Crucible Islands, a region of Titan about which nothing had been established beyond their name and location. Gates finally provides a little information about the islands, revealing them to be the home of an quasi-religious order of healers known as the Guardians. 

My character is an acolyte there, one of a group chosen to travel to Allansia to help combat an outbreak of demon plague (a plague which causes its victims to transform into demonic entities, not to be confused with Dead of Night's Demon-Plague, which just kills people very nastily). We have a quantity of the only known cure, a plant derivative called smoke-oil, and mean to take it to the Temple of Throff in Allansia, which may somehow be able to duplicate it in sufficient quantities to cure all the afflicted. That is, assuming we can find the Temple, which is hidden in the Invisible City, but the learned folk of Kaynlesh-Ma should be able to pinpoint its location for us. Or they might if we ever got to consult them. Alas, the voyage does not run as smoothly as had been hoped. Our small fleet sinks, and only two of us survive, rescued by a fishing vessel which makes landfall further north than we'd planned to travel, in the rather less scholarly environs of Port Blacksand.

The aftereffects of the turbulent crossing include a Stamina deduction in the very first section of the adventure, so I'd better determine my stats before I start depleting them...
Skill 9
Stamina 18
Luck 8
Marginally below average, but I'm pretty sure that's no worse than on either of my previous goes at the book.

Anyway, the elderly Brother Tobyn and I are the only remaining members of the expedition. We have just ten vials of smoke-oil, a small quantity of gold, and the clothes we wear. No weapons and, by the end of the first paragraph, no stomach contents either.

Brother Tobyn decides that we need to start by getting something to eat. Proceeding to the Fish Market, we find a fishwife offering grilled sardines for the exorbitant price of one Gold Piece. Well, it'll help restore some of the Stamina I just heaved up, so I pay the price.

Meanwhile, our rescuer is getting into a heated argument with the local merchant to whom he's attempting to sell the fish he caught on the way here. He complains that the price being offered is unreasonably low, while the merchant claims that this is the best deal he's going to get here. As both men grow increasingly agitated, the merchant suddenly transforms into a monstrous creature which attacks first the fisherman and then Brother Tobyn.

It was at this point that I went awry in my first attempt at the book. Suspecting that if I used a vial of smoke-oil to reverse the transformation, I would soon be robbed of my remaining vials, I attacked the monstrous merchant, who reverted to human form once I'd killed him. Conveniently arriving too late to see him in his demonic aspect, the local militia arrested me for murder (and Brother Tobyn as an accessory) and locked us up. Not long after that I learned that, like lycanthropy, demon plague can be passed on by a wound, as Brother Tobyn turned into something nasty and attacked me, and I didn't survive that fight.

This time I cure the merchant, thereby attracting the attention of some guards and a red-eyed reptilian figure in grey, hooded robes. Bystanders appear fearful of the hooded one, who tells me that the guards don't like outsiders, and says we should go with him. Opting not to judge by appearances, I take his advice, and we follow the mysterious character through the streets, Brother Tobyn already showing signs of being in a bad way.

Eventually we reach a house located under a bridge, which pretty much confirms to anyone who's played City of Thieves that accompanying the stranger was the right decision. Once we're indoors, our host removes the robe and dispels the enchantment that disguised him as a non-human. It's Nicodemus, the reclusive and occasionally helpful wizard, who wants to provide me with vague assistance in my quest. To this end he gives me four quirkily-named potions (and no explanation of what any of them do), advises me to head for Salamonis to seek information on how to find the Invisible City, says I'll have to travel alone because Brother Tobyn has demon plague, and encourages me to take the robes with which he concealed his identity, so nobody will bother me on my way out of the city.

The book tries to make me suspect that Nicodemus might be up to no good, and offers a couple of pretty obviously inadvisable alternatives to doing as he says, but I'm not taken in. As I take the robe, Brother Tobyn metamorphoses into something nasty, and before I can even think of using another vial of smoke-oil to cure him, Nicodemus vaporises him on the grounds that the next part of the gamebook isn't structured to handle the potential presence of a sidekick he was doomed anyway. Disregarding the blatantly suicidal option of attacking the wizard who just blasted my erstwhile companion into his component atoms, I don the robe and head out of town.

Thanks to the sorcerous disguise, I am untroubled by the various rogues and miscreants I pass on my way to the main gate, but the robe vanishes as soon as I pass beyond the city walls, causing me to revert to my normal appearance. A nearby beggar with dirty cloths wrapped around his eyes and ears offers to tell me secrets in return for a Gold Piece. I pay up, and he reveals that he was once a powerful wizard, but Blacksand's ruler had him blinded, deafened and muted, yet still failed to completely deprive him of his power (I hadn't noticed until he pointed it out, but he's addressing me telepathically rather than verbally). After handing me a bottle of 'Nostalgia' perfume and a flask of poison antidote, he advises me to follow the Corpse Road, view the magic city from Mount Meerar, pass through the Gates of Death, and not eat too many pies. One of these hints is not like the others...

Setting off towards Salamonis, I haven't gone far before a quintet of armed brigands accosts me, demanding everything but the shirt on my back, and offering an ominous-sounding 'special gift' if I comply. To the best of my knowledge, I can't succeed in my quest unless I retain at least one vial of smoke-oil, so I must either fight or flee. It appears that if I'd been imprisoned in Port Blacksand, I might now have a weapon that could aid me in combat against the group, but as I wasn't, I'd better use an item.

One of the potions Nicodemus gave me has the name 'Thick as Thieves', which suggests that it might be of some use in this situation. I uncork the bottle, and a cloud of blue smoke emerges and heads straight for the would-be robbers' nostrils. In an instant the men's wits are addled, an argument breaks out, and while the gang might no longer be able to remember that their swords are called swords, they still know how to use them well enough that not one of them survives the fight.

Searching the bodies, I help myself to a sword, a sausage, and a jar of healing ointment. Then I set off down the road again, and don't get far before a black horse-drawn carriage (if you're wondering whether that 'black' describes the carriage or the horses, it's both) on its way out of Port Blacksand catches up to me. Its passenger, a veiled woman who introduces herself as Lady Webspinn, thanks me for dealing with the highwaymen who've been preying on travellers, and offers me a lift to Salamonis.

While the combination of colour scheme, veil and name could be considered ominous, I accept. Lady Webspinn introduces me to her maidservant Liara and asks me where I'm going. On my previous attempt at this book, prompted by a warning in the paragraph text, I made up something rather than reveal the truth, but subsequent developments made it clear that everything which hints that the Lady might be up to no good is just misdirection, so this time I'll reveal my destination.

When I mention that I seek the Invisible City, Lady Webspinn says that she's heard it can only be found by those who know where to look for it, recommends I call on Swann the mapmaker in Salamonis, and gives directions to his shop. At her direction, Liara offers me some food, and as I'm still below full Stamina, I accept. The meal is good, and after eating, I doze off.

When I awaken, the carriage has stopped in Silverton for the night. Lady Webspinn tells me to be back at the carriage by daybreak if I want to continue travelling with her tomorrow, and she and Liara head into the local inn. I decide to save the cost of a room, and take shelter in a nearby stable.

My rest is disturbed when a bad pun attempts to steal my money. Hurling the armlike Hay Thiever away from myself, I see it start to crawl away, and decide to try and follow it to its lair in case there's good loot to be found there. I get a bit dirty, as it's been raining, and I blunder into some puddles along the way, but eventually the creature enters a hole in a wall, and I risk reaching inside. There are many items in there, and I pull out a pouch containing some gold. The book is sure to penalise greed sooner or later, but overcautiousness can also doom a gamebook hero, so I'll risk one further attempt at grabbing loot. It nets me a potion bottle, duplicating one of the as yet unused potions from Nicodemus, and the Thiever is becoming very agitated, so I'll quit while I'm ahead.

Returning to the stable, I settle down once more, and the rest of the night passes without incident. Awakened by a cockerel, I head for Lady Webspinn's carriage. A porter is loading it, and informs me that it's private and not for the likes of me, but remembering her Ladyship's invitation, I ignore him and knock on the door, and am welcomed aboard. Lady Webspinn says she will be glad of my company, as Liara is unwell, and authorially-imposed idiocy keeps me from wondering if the illness could be demon plague. Even so, the rest of the journey to Salamonis passes without incident, though we do see assorted demon plague victims along the way.

Purple clouds hang in the sky above the city, subjecting it to a deluge of similarly-coloured rain. Lady Webspinn takes this as evidence that there is a demon portal close by, quoting an old rhyme (a blatant parody of the obvious Prince song), and teaching me an incantation that will enable me to escape from the portal (and mess with the book's internal chronology) if I get drawn into it.

Leaving Liara in the coach, Lady Webspinn asks me to accompany her to the Halls of Learning, where she hopes to find information about the plague, and again I say nothing about having more than enough of the cure to be able to help out and still complete my mission. I do agree to act as an armed escort, though, and we set off through the streets. Observing demons skulking in an alleyway, Lady Webspinn gives me a silver ring that will protect me, and anyone familiar with what Titan has to say about runes will recognise its inscription as indicating a connection with the Neutral powers. She says she knows of a secret passage into the Halls, and I follow her down a flight of steps to a courtyard containing a statue of trickster deity Logaan, which displays the same symbol as the ring.

Assorted demons who, to judge by their clothes, used to be local tradespersons and nobles, advance upon us. Lady Webspinn approaches the statue and pushes on the symbol (which, in an instance of authorial and/or editorial carelessness, has changed from a star to an arrow, mixing up the two runes used by the tricksters). Part of a nearby wall opens to reveal a tunnel entrance, from which issues the smell of rotting meat. Still preferable to confronting the demonic horde, so I follow the Lady into the passageway, and she reseals the entrance before any of the demons can get through it.

As we follow the winding tunnel, Lady Webspinn reveals that she's a scholar from Salamonis, who had travelled to Port Blacksand in the hope of meeting with Nicodemus to see if he could help combat the plague, but wasn't able to find him. We find the source of the unpleasant smell - a dead guard, showing signs of having been killed by a demon, indicating these tunnels to be less secure than Lady Webspinn had hoped. The passage forks, and her Ladyship tells me that one turning leads to Titan Square, the heart of the city, while the other goes to the Halls, and gives me the option of going my own way. I choose to stick with her until she reaches whatever safety can be found under the circumstances.

At last we reach the Halls, where several other scholars are chained to pillars. Lady Webspinn moves to free them until they explain that they've chosen to be immobilised in this way so that if any of them succumb to the plague, they won't be able to harm the others. There's a kind of logic to that, but it does leave them all vulnerable if any demons should break in.

Two demons break in. Well, actually there's a bit of exposition first - the scholars mention another adventurer who passed through a short while ago, and Lady Webspinn urges me to visit the mapmaker - but comedic timing trumps chronology. I use a vial of smoke-oil to change the demons back into the soldiers they used to be, and they volunteer to stay here and protect the scholars from further incursions.

It's time I was moving on. Another purple downpour commences as I leave the Halls, but it doesn't keep me from reaching Titan Square, which is overshadowed by a massive statue of the eponymous deity. There are exits to all cardinal points of the compass, but west leads to where I entered the city, so that's not an option. Remembering the directions I was given, I head north to a crossroads, continue north to another crossroads, and then turn west. Most of the shops on this street have been boarded up, and a jeweller's has been burned down, but the mapmaker's shows signs of still being occupied, and a peek through the window reveals that the proprietor is accompanied by four Man-Orc guards.

Observing the glint of gold in the ruin of the jeweller's, I decide to investigate. Bad idea: it turns out that the jeweller had a load of gold teeth, which he retained when the plague transformed him into a demonic monstrosity, and they're what I saw shining. Dodging his attack, I stumble into a hole where the fire destroyed the floorboards, and land in the cellar, which contains more locals-turned demons. Lots of them. Too many to cure or fight, so I get torn apart.

So, again I fall victim to the cryptic nuances of gamebook morality. Sometimes seeking valuables is the only way of being able to acquire an essential item, and sometimes it just gets you punished for being too greedy. Incidentally, my second attempt at this book also ended thanks to my misjudging a grey area, though on that occasion I fell victim to strong drink while trying to find out if a little social interaction with a Dwarf would furnish me with any helpful information.

When I started this post, I considered The Gates of Death to be a flawed gamebook, but undeserving of the intensity of hatred that it gets from some fans, and nothing that happened while playing it again has changed my opinion.

Better Trained, Better Equipped, Better... Better!

The Prisoners of Time is the second of the Mongoose Books Lone Wolf reissues to feature a mini-adventure set after the main adventure rather than before it. Now that I've won Prisoners, I'll move on to the bonus material, James M. Stuart's Lord of Meledor, hoping that it's not as linear or as harsh as the slog that it accompanies.

In this adventure I play the part of Lorkon Ironheart, leader of the army that fought the forces of the Chaos-master when not too busy having friendly fire incidents. In the two years since otherworldly interloper Lone Wolf assisted in the slaying of the Chaos-master (sure, he may have struck the final blow, and most-to-all of the others that preceded it, but I was the one who wore the Chaos-master down by making him chase me and try to hit me with a tree, so, you know, credit where it's due), my troops have been driving the remnants of the Chaos-master's armies from our lands, and only occasionally massacring each other.

Now I've been called upon to deal with bandits based in the Nahgoth forest, who have been attacking nearby villages, causing death and destruction, and retreating to cover before any proper opposition can get organised. I get together 400 cavalry to aid me, so perhaps Lone Wolf told me about incidents in his world in which armies of 50 or 100 fared poorly against unexpectedly numerous bandits.

Before I get going, there is the matter of character creation. Randomness determines my stats, giving me:
Combat Skill 10
Endurance 25
I also get to pick three of a possible five special skills, and given that my CS is as low as it could get, I think I'd better make one of them Swordmaster in order to gain a +3 bonus when fighting with a sword, making me just mediocre rather than appallingly inept. For the other two, I'll have Enhanced Psi and Master Tactician, and hope that the sort of situation that Rune Mastery clearly exists to remedy is not an unavoidable element of the adventure.

Starting equipment is at least partly pre-determined. I have a broadsword, armour painted with runes to ward off chaos, a backpack, and three healing potions. No food and no money, though the description of the backpack's carrying capacity suggests that I will need to eat at times. Maybe I'll have a chance to pick up more stuff before my troops and I properly hit the road.

Maybe not. By the end of the first section, I'm leading my army to the site of the most recent bandit attack. And not only do I have no opportunity to collect further equipment, I don't even get to make a decision. Just shunted on to a new section, which likewise ends in a redirection rather than a choice. I wonder if Mr Stuart thinks allowing the reader to have any influence on what happens would be bringing too much Chaos into the sequence of events.

We see the smoke before we catch sight of the hamlet itself. Or rather, its remnants. The buildings have been torched, and their inhabitants killed and mutilated. Near one smouldering ruin are assorted beings, some of them human, the others chaos-spawned hybrids. While the initial description of the mob had them arguing, the next section says that they're marching away, and pick up their pace upon catching sight of us, leaving the slow-moving undead who didn't previously get a mention lagging behind. 

At this point I can choose what to do, though first my Master Tactician skill provides advice which suggests that a more appropriate name for it would be Stating the Blooming Obvious: if I let the bandits escape, I won't be able to obtain any information from them, but sending some of my troops in pursuit risks exposing them to danger.

If the author wants my army dead, they're going to get slaughtered no matter what I do, and letting the only promising lead I have just escape seems unlikely to facilitate progress. My fastest units and I give chase - but our quarry reach the cover of the forest before we can catch up to them, and the thickness of the vegetation makes it necessary to dismount if we want to keep going. Conditions have now become that bit too unfavourable, so I think it better to turn back and hope to find some kind of clue on one of the undead.

Calling off the chase leads to another section ending only in a redirection, but this one is more reasonable, as it points to the same section I'd have turned to if I'd not given pursuit at all. Using an interim section to hide the fact that the outcome would be the same (at least until after the decision was made) is sound authorial strategy.

No further mention of the slower-moving enemies, so presumably even they were actually quick enough to elude us. Makes me wonder why they were even mentioned. Anyway, with no leads at all I must now try to anticipate where the next attack will occur, so we can be ready for the bandits and their inhuman associates. Will being a Master Tactician prove any more helpful here?

It does: the series of past raids suggests a pattern, from which I deduce that the enemy's next target is likely to be the town of Khonat. We proceed there, evacuate the locals, and prepare an ambush. Again there's a decision-free section transition, but unless not choosing Master Tactician automatically results in failure (and I do know of a gamebook which is apparently unwinnable if a certain special skill is not picked during character creation), there'd have to be a textual bottleneck to bring at least some of the 'chose other skills' players back onto the same track that I'm on.

Scouts soon confirm that this is where the hostile forces are now headed - and reveal that my troops are outnumbered four to one. What is it with the Lone Wolf system and ridiculously oversized and well-organised bandit armies? We prepare for the attack, and it would appear that Rune Mastery would help with shoring up our defences. Well, we'll just have to do without whatever edge that skill might have provided.

The enemy come into view. A horde of bandits and mercenaries (the latter distinguished from the former by uniforms) with rusting armour and well-maintained weapons is flanked on both sides by chaotic monstrosities, and despite having seen undead amongst the retreating troops at the devastated hamlet, I am apparently surprised to see animated corpses bringing up the rear. The author draws particular attention to the zombie of a biped with the head of a horse, and then forgets about it in the excitement of another decision-free section transition.

As the attack commences, the bandits defy their leaders' commands and stand their ground, letting their chaotic and undead allies precede them into battle. Volleys of arrows bring down many of the chaos-spawn, but have little effect upon the shambling corpses. My troops draw their swords as our opponents near striking distance, and again I get redirected to a new section without any opportunity to influence the course of events.

Once battle is joined, I am targeted by an Undead Agtah Assassination Squad. My bodyguards reduce the amount of damage I take, which is a good thing, as the random factor skews towards the 'fare poorly' end of the scale, but as the text doesn't bother to indicate whether halves round up or down, I can't be sure exactly how much Endurance I lose. If this adventure ends with a close-fought battle, that ambiguity could spell the difference between success and failure, but considering how that first fight went, I'm probably doomed regardless.

In the battle as a whole, the tide is slowly turning in our favour, as our opponents' numerical advantage is outweighed by my troops' greater proficiency and organisation. Thus, when I catch sight of an enemy who's got better armour than the rest, and is actually issuing orders to his subordinates, I figure that eliminating him could prove advantageous. Given my poor Combat Skill, the likelihood of my successfully taking him out isn't as high as I'd like, but as there's no option to send a more competent fighter to deal with him, I just down one of my healing potions and charge at him.

Well, the randomiser certainly made up for its earlier bias against me. In the course of eviscerating that Bandit Officer I took less damage than was healed by the potion. Some of my troops form a protective cordon around me and my dying foe as I attempt to interrogate him regarding who is behind these attacks. He refuses to speak, so I make use of my Enhanced Psi to probe his mind.

Oh yes, the Mind Probe.

Before he dies, I see visions of a bearded man in robes, his flesh visibly rotting in places, outlining a battle plan, and then draining the life of a chaos beast, followed by the sight of a city in which people wear herb pouches over their faces, where a mixed army much like the one we're fighting is mustering in a public square.

The section to which I now turn has its number right at the bottom of one page (in footer territory), and its text at the top of the next one, and that's not even the worst instance of such editorial sloppiness in this book - the next such error has the section number and the corresponding text on different two-page spreads.

Searching the corpse, I find a Golden Medallion with the image of a dragon on it. I get to choose whether or not to retain it, so I'm going to have to guess whether it's helpful or harmful. And since this series has precedent for both lacking a certain item and possessing a specific object to guarantee Instant Death, choosing poorly here could end very badly. I think I'll risk taking it, in case it's needed for passing a checkpoint somewhere in enemy territory.

Oh, and remember how these adventures distinguish between Backpack Items and Special Items, and have separate carrying capacities for both? Well, somebody involved in the making of this one forgot, so I'm going to have to guess about that, too. Not that it matters at the moment, but it could be a problem if I pick up more stuff along the way. Especially if the adventure forces me to carry around a load of irrelevant tat.

Just like that, the battle is over. The enemy forces are routed, and this time my cavalry are able to thin the ranks of the fleeing miscreants. That should put an end to the raids on villages, but I'm left wondering who instigated them, and how he managed to get the disparate groups involved to cooperate. Then a healer brings me a potion, which restores most of the Endurance I lost in combat (or all of it, depending on which way I should have rounded off those pesky half-points of damage).

Stepping out of character for a moment, I've just remembered that the group of Sommerlund's Most Unwanted that Lone Wolf fought just before taking on Vonotar included one villain with a comically long beard. And a quick peek back at the potted biographies of that rogue's gallery confirms that one of them was a necromancer. What are the odds that Lone Wolf didn't kill him hard enough, and he's the one behind all this unpleasantness?

Anyway, I get shunted to a fresh section to consult with my surviving officers. It turns out that we captured some of the enemy as well as killing a load of them. The chaos beasts in their midst are being slaughtered, but the humans get treated humanely, and we question them about their leader. They know little beyond the fact that they were promised lots of loot and really don't enjoy fighting alongside chaos-spawn. Such creatures are apparently prone to ignoring the distinction between friend and foe (even more so than my own troops), and powerful magic was being employed to keep them from indiscriminately mauling bandits and mercenaries along with the villagers they were massacring. Whoever is responsible for all this is obviously a serious threat.

Only one of the men we question provides any more concrete information, thereby bridging the gap between metaknowledge and in-character awareness. The vision of people with herbal face-masks combined with my memories of the endgame of Prisoners had already made it clear to me as a reader that the villain was based in Haagadar (which is also where Lone Wolf fought the necrobeardy), but the last brigand to be questioned provides confirmation that that's where out real enemy has his HQ.

Given that Haagadar is a long way away, and has formidable natural defences, I decide against taking an army there. Well, the decision is made for me - I've just been redirected from section to section without any input into what happens for a while. In fact, almost two thirds of the sections through which I've passed so far ended with a single 'Turn to' direction, and around half of the rest were special skill checks rather than proper choices. But I digress.

The plan is to send a team of scouts to infiltrate Haagadar and gather intel. Well, 'send' as in 'lead'. And, gamebooks being gamebooks, I imagine that this expedition will include a confrontation with Zombie Saruman rather than just having us find out what's going on and come back to lead a better-prepared army in an assault on Haagadar.

The night's rest before we set off on this mission provides enough healing that I'm back up to full health regardless of rounding. The first few days of the 'difficult journey' which ensues are covered in just a few sentences, which is a bit unimpressive, but after another special skill check, things get more detailed. I'm not sure that that's an improvement, though, as my anonymous companions and I now get to experience a cut-price version of the tedious mystic trip that Lone Wolf experienced at around this stage of the trek. Blah blah psychedelia, blah blah flashback, blah blah false memories, blah blah possible premonition of a dragon, blah blah section transition.

Suddenly everything goes normal, and my generic associates and I find ourselves at a desert oasis not that far from Haagadar. Uncertain how long it has actually taken us to get this far, we pick up the pace for the march through the wasteland between the oasis and our goal. Left, right, left, right, left, right, aaand... wait for it... section transition!

We are at the bottom of a cliff, and Haagadar is at the top, surrounded by a wall with a big statue of a dragon on it. Like Lone Wolf before me, I am faced with a choice between trying to climb the cliff and sneaking into the city via a sewage culvert, and like my predecessor I opt for the latter. If that vision of a dragon was showing a potential encounter, or a symbolic representation of the city's defences, the climb might be even more dangerous than your standard ascent of a steep rock face without ropes or safety net. Yes, there are hostile creatures lurking in the foul waters we shall traverse, but I'm sure the unidentified bunch by my side will prove a match, or at least a distraction, for any attacking denizens of the detritus.

There's a walkway alongside the stream of filth, and luminescent fungi make it easier for us to see where we're going. And also to see the threat which awaits us on the other side of the next section transition. Which turns out to be a mystical barrier rather than muck-dwelling fauna. Rune Mastery would come in handy here, but I don't have it. Resisting the temptation to sneak a peek at the consequences of passing through the barrier, which are on the facing page (there really is no excuse for having decision and outcome that close together when there are so many choice-free sections just to bulk out the numbers), I reluctantly choose to turn back and try the climb.

As with reconsidering pursuing the enemy at the start of the adventure, there's an interim section to disguise the fact that there's no penalty for changing your mind, and I don't have a problem with that one either.

We take off our armour and attach it to our packs, split up into pairs, and rope ourselves together with previously unmentioned safety equipment before commencing our ascent. My partner in climb gains a name, Oran, but loses his footing at an inconvenient moment, and randomness determines whether or not I lose my grip. The odds would be worse if my Endurance were low, but even without that penalty, they're not great.

I get the middling outcome, which takes me to a nonexistent section. A quick check to see if lopping off the first or last digit takes me to the right section... nope, so I'm going to have to check for online errata. The only list I can find points out that one edition of Prisoners slightly misspelled the name of the cover artist, and the Mongoose edition's Combat Results Table designates the player character as Lone Wolf even though Lorkon Ironheart is the hero of the mini-adventure, but overlooks the whole 'spectacularly wrong section number listed' thing. I'm just going to have to go through section by section until I find the right one. And despite trying to focus only on the first few words of each section, I still come across a massive spoiler before discovering that the book meant 138 when it said 199.

[That error and the spoiler so annoyed me that it took around a week for me to work up sufficient motivation to play on.]

By wedging a fist into a crack, I manage to keep us from falling while Oran finds a foothold, but I take some damage in the process. We resume our climb, reaching the top without further incident, and put our armour back on, donning cloaks as a vague attempt at disguise. I brush off Oran's attempt at an apology because my character doesn't yet know what I inadvertently learned while trying to find the right section, and thinks the slip was a genuine accident.

We're still on the wrong side of the city wall, so we need to either do some more climbing or head for the doubtless guarded gate. Our not having been attacked by a dragon on the way up has me wondering if that vision I had was a cryptic hint that the Golden Medallion might enable me to impersonate an officer from the army being mustered here, so I opt to head for the gate.

When the gate comes into view I see a couple of guards with swords and crossbows, who look inattentive, being rather too confident that any would-be attackers will be unable to get past the cliff. The options available to me here include bluffing and trying to use Enhanced Psi, but I know that using powers of the mind sometimes costs Endurance, so I'll stick with the Medallion plan.

The text again points out that the sheerness of the cliff has lulled the guards into a false sense of security. Maybe Mr Stuart should have checked his notes and reminded himself that it's not the reader who's failing to pay attention. There is indeed a check to see if I have the Medallion, which I display prominently as I march up to the guards and claim to be bringing news from Vhozada. Despite the text's having repeatedly stressed how complacent the guards are, there's still a 40% chance of their seeing through the deception, which seems a bit high.

I get the more favourable outcome, which means that the guard I address, though clearly very suspicious, nevertheless allows us through. What happened to the whole 'slacking because he was sure enemies would be incapable of getting up here' thing? Seems to me that if anyone wasn't paying attention, it was the author and editor.

Once inside the city we notice its foul smell (what are the walls and gate made of, to contain it so effectively?), and cover our noses and mouths with our hands to try and block the stench, also concealing our faces from the locals. And we're back to strings of gratuitous section transitions with no choices or checks. We distance ourselves from the gates, and take shelter in an abandoned building. At the text's behest I head up to the roof for a better view. The city looks grim, and as I proceed to the fifth consecutive option-free redirection, so does the adventure.

One of my companions tends my wounds, healing the damage I took during the climb. It's time we were on the move again, and I get to make a decision, though only a 'be smart or take unnecessary risks' one. Do we continue to keep a low profile, or are we suddenly in such a hurry that stealth is no longer an option? I don't think there's going to be a 'your homeland is destroyed because you didn't reach enemy HQ half an hour earlier' ending, so let's stick to back-streets and alleyways as much as possible.

We head for the city centre, passing a rogue apostrophe and another choice-free section transition. The alley we are using leads to a wider street, and to a startling sight hidden behind yet another redirection to a new paragraph. That sight turns out to be a parade of chaos beasts, bandits, mercenaries and undead, led by a bearded man in dirty robes, who shows clear signs of physical decay and chaos mutation, but radiates power. He's obviously in charge of the enemy forces, and takes them out of sight and into a fresh paragraph.

Distancing ourselves from the street, we head back up the alley. Up ahead, a gang of chaos beasts rounds a corner and rushes at us. A second mob of brutes follows behind them. I have to choose between flight and two variants of fight, and Master Tactician provides no hints. In case the influence that was restraining the chaos beasts in the army isn't affecting these creatures, I lead a charge at the closer lot, hoping to provoke a retreat and have the two groups come into conflict with each other.

While it seems that the two groups of enemies just combine, the charge does give us a slight edge. Nevertheless, I now have to fight two chaos beasts in turn, and I should probably try to conclude the battle rapidly, as their chaotic influence appears to be warping the text, producing a direction for if I should win 'all both of these combats'.

I survive the fight, but now find myself alone, with most of my companions lying dead in the alley, and Oran missing presumed captured. My character, still being unaware of that spoiler, shudders to think what horrors my erstwhile climbing buddy might now be experiencing. Following another redirection to a new section, I conclude that the 'man' I saw leading the parade has the potential to become as serious a threat as the Chaos-master, and I need to kill him before I leave this place.

Using my Enhanced Psi, I attempt to send a message about the situation here to my people in case I should fail to overcome the new enemy leader, but find that something is blocking all telepathic communication.

After sheltering and resting in another abandoned building, thereby recovering a little of the Endurance I lost in the fight, I encounter another Rune Mastery check. For a skill that the rules made out to be all about chaos-proofing armour, it's coming up more often than expected.

Missing out on whatever benefit the skill would have provided, I return to the back streets of Haagadar and make my way to the temple at the centre, sensing that the villain I seek is based within. A couple of tentacled monstrosities stand guard by the main doors, so I decide to try the vent on the roof that Lone Wolf ignored back when he was trying to get into the same place. The vent leads me to a chamber with a locked door, and I use Enhanced Psi to get it open, losing a little Endurance. In anticipation of a climactic fight or two, I down the rest of my healing potions.

Leaving the room and closing the door gets a paragraph all to itself. Proceeding down the corridor past numerous bolted doors, I reach some unsecured double doors and a spiral staircase leading up. I ascend to a balcony overlooking a circular hall, in which a marble throne stands in front of a grotesquely-carved archway opening into a dark void.

In front of the throne, the bearded man and Oran are talking. For some reason, Oran has stripped to the waist, as a result of which I can see the reptilian scales that cover much of his torso, indicating him to have been an agent of chaos for some time. Eavesdropping on the conversation, I learn that the semi-decomposed mutant is named Vezh, and he thinks I must have fled the city, while Oran believes me to be in hiding and devising a new strategy. I guess I am, in a way, but not quite as he thinks.

The text presents me with three options, and while yelling at my enemies is obviously a bad idea, I'm not sure if remaining hidden will enable me to learn something of value or just lead to my being discovered and losing the opportunity to launch a surprise attack. Waiting could also mean that something nasty has time to come through the portal, so I think I'll just hurl myself into melee.

While I have surprise on my side, I am outnumbered and Vezh knows magic, so the odds are not in my favour. If I get 7 or above a lot, I might be in with a chance, so let's see what the randomiser has for me... More low numbers than high, alas, so while I do a decent bit of damage, my foes are still standing by the time I expire.

Well, while Lord of Meledor shares many of the flaws of the full-length adventure it accompanies, it's not as tedious, and probably less unfair - winning that combat would not have taken me to the final section, so I don't know what follows the fight, and thus can't be certain that the climax doesn't involve egregiously unfair authorial shenanigans. Still, I wouldn't be averse to playing it again, though I'd definitely want less abysmal stats.

Sometimes We Deliberately Step Into Those Traps

While the first two Plot Your Own Horror Story gamebooks never seemed to get beyond the 'old town' part of Tunbridge Wells (at least until a second-hand copy of Nightmare Store turned up in a charity shop near the precinct last decade), the next couple were more widespread, and were actually the first books in the series that I ever saw. I wasn't all that interested in them by comparison with the likes of Fighting Fantasy, Lone Wolf, Grail Quest and Falcon, but I took the odd look at one of them, and became quite familiar with it after one of my sisters got a copy.

For some reason I didn't engage much with the other, released in the UK as Grand Hotel of Horror (perhaps because the original title, Horror Hotel!, was so similar to the British title of the first book in the series), but during a school trip to London, when we went into a bookshop at one point and that was the only unknown-to-me gamebook on the shelves, I did give it a little attention, winding up on the ending that has the viewpoint character falling into the piranha-infested pond.

That was the entirety of my history with GHoH until a few Decembers ago, when I chanced upon a copy on eBay and bought it. What with Christmas and related activities and acquisitions, I didn't give the book any real attention after it came in the post, so this will be my first proper attempt at it.

My family is taking a break at the Cliff's Edge Hotel in Colorado, and while my parents get settled in the room, I check out the nearby shops for souvenirs, buying a packet of photographic slides (wonder if they'll have any significance later on) and picking up a pamphlet about legends associated with the hotel. A sudden downpour discourages me from heading straight back to the hotel, and to pass the time until the rain eases off, I read the pamphlet.

According to the pamphlet, a gold prospector who'd struck it lucky had the hotel built at the turn of the century, but the place soon gained a bad reputation. One of the stone cutters working on its construction fell to his death, and on the hotel's opening night a honeymooning bride threw herself off a balcony. A maid tumbled into a laundry chute and was never seen again, a baby disappeared without explanation, and within a year the establishment was closed down and the owner moved away.

A while after that, the building was temporarily used to incarcerate convicts while a proper prison was being built, during which time three escaping felons had a fatal fall and a visiting spouse wandered into a closet and vanished. Around a decade after that the place became a girls' school, which initially did quite well, but was closed down after four of the pupils went missing.

Almost fourteen years later a doctor bought the Cliff's Edge and converted it into a 'special' hospital, but had difficulties retaining staff. Rumours spread concerning bizarre medical experiments performed on some of the patients, and another closure soon followed. After that the place remained abandoned until its current owners acquired it in the late 1970s. Extensive renovations preceded its reopening as a hotel, and five years have passed without any noteworthy incidents.

Some of the older locals are still dubious about the place, and assert that it contains a network of hidden stairways and a secret elevator that goes all the way down to the river (at least some of which you'd expect to have been discovered while the building was being renovated and the new central heating system was installed, but you can't always expect logic from gossip, gamebooks or horror stories, so anything is possible).

Suddenly I become aware that it's getting dark outside, and the rain has stopped. I hurry back uphill to the hotel, observing that surprisingly few lights are on it, and there are no cars parked outside - not even the one in which my parents and I travelled here. Though somewhat perturbed, I still go inside, and cannot find anyone else in the building. Not at the reception desk, not in the coffee bar, not in room 309, where my family is staying...

The malleability of reality that is a feature of this series of books immediately comes into play, as the first decision offered by the text requires me to determine whether the hotel has been evacuated or something strange has happened to me. Despite what I said about logic a couple of paragraphs back, I find the evacuation option that bit too implausible owing to the lack of any kind of cordon around the hotel or the hill, so I'll go with the unspecified weirdness.

Not only are my parents absent from the room, but none of our stuff is in there either. I resume my search for other people, trying the dining room since a meal is imminent. Also empty, so I carry on into the kitchen, and for the first time since I got back here, I see people. Two men stand by a table, and I approach them, but when they turn around, I realise that something is wrong. Even if I discard the frankly bigoted suggestion that nobody with facial scars would be employed in a hotel kitchen, the unsanitary stench of the first man indicates that he ought not to be in a food preparation area.

Backing away, I trip on an uneven tile. The men approach, one of them brandishing a knife. The other tells me I have no place here, and produces a rusty pair of handcuffs. He gets a cuff around one of my wrists before some semblance of narrative control returns to me, allowing me to choose whether or not I can escape from this situation. A twinge of déjà vu leads me to suspect that getting away may take me from the frying pans to the fish, so I risk seeing what happens if I fail to get away.

Well, either my memory played me false or I'd blundered into one of the 'all options lead to death' situations that can be found at times in these books. Once the cuffs are in place, the man drags me over to the walk-in freezer and uses the cuffs to suspend me from a meathook alongside several sides of beef.

The book doesn't confirm whether or not the light goes out when the door is closed.

Since writing the above I've had several more goes at the book, thereby establishing that my memory was not completely reliable. Escaping from the men in the kitchen does not lead directly to another bad ending (and the piranha death isn't even on the same branch as the convicts in the kitchen). Nevertheless, at another stage of the adventure, picking what appeared to be the worse of the possible developments was what led to the first 'good' ending I reached, so allowing seemingly bad things to happen isn't always a bad idea in this book. 

As of yet, there's been no mention of the photographic slides (beyond the initial purchase) on any of the routes I've taken through the book, so maybe they never become a Chekhov's pistol. Mind you, the back cover of the book mentions a gravestone with my name on, and I haven't seen any sign of that, either, so there's still potential for me to spot a clue or a nasty twist in one of the transparencies on a currently unexplored path...

Quite Dangerous and It Might Not Work

A local hospice has numerous charity shops scattered throughout the region (more than half a dozen in Hull alone), and several of them have helped me build up my gamebook collection over the years. Two were the source of almost a third of my collection of Puffin FF books (including the big batch that revived my interest in the series in the first place), another provided me with the then-elusive third Fabled Lands book, and the two closest to my home have enabled me to replace various well-used volumes in my collections of Blood Sword, Golden Dragon, Grail Quest and Way of the Tiger books with copies in much better condition.

Towards the end of last year, when an unavoidable appointment had taken me towards town during what would normally be working hours, my homeward route passed one of those shops, and I decided to pop in for a quick browse. The words 'Choose your own story' on the spine of one book caught my attention, and as the price was reasonable and nothing else on the shelves appealed, I decided to give it a go, and bought Simon Tudhope's Shadow Chaser. This is the first book in a comparatively recent series, published by Usborne this decade, and so far it's the only one of them I own. Playing it is liable to help determine whether or not I seek any of the later ones.

I don't usually include pictures of book covers,
but then again I don't usually get accused of making up details of what the covers say, either.

Character generation is largely done for me. I always start with 12 Life points, and have four Ability scores (Athleticism, Sixth Sense, Endurance and Skill). The latter all start at 3, though I may add a point to one of them before I start. With, as yet, no idea if the book tests one Ability more frequently than the others, I opt for Sixth Sense.

The adventure itself starts quite abruptly. as I am awakened by a loud cry and a knock at the door. Grabbing the locket which is apparently my only noteworthy possession, I sneak a peek outside. Five cloaked figures stand outside the door, their leader unnaturally pale, with sunken eyes.

Seemingly sensing my presence, the pale figure addresses me as 'young apprentice', telling me that 'an old friend begs an audience' and laughing. The cry sounds again, and I become aware that it's an inner voice, and that there's something familiar about the leader. A little belatedly the text notes that I should add that locket to my inventory.

Opening the door seems like a bad idea, but I might be able to remember or learn something if I stall for a bit rather than just fleeing straight off. I ask who the old friend is, and take stock, noting the belt and hatchet hanging nearby. The man mentions several things that my character is probably already aware of: I am a foundling, who was abandoned on a carpenter's doorstep one night, and I am known as Rowan, though my true identity is unknown to me.

The sound of footsteps around the side of the house suggests that my 'visitors' aren't going to wait to be invited in, so I grab the belt and hatchet and seek an exit other than the front door. An awkwardly placed nugget of exposition reveals that the carpenter who brought me up is known as Old Joe, and he's not currently around.

At the rear of the house a window overlooks an alley, spanned by a neighbour's clothesline. An Athleticism roll determines how well my attempted escape goes, and my chances of success are 50/50. What I roll would have been a failure even if I'd boosted Athleticism rather than Sixth Sense at the outset, but the consequent fall isn't catastrophic: I just lose a point of Life, and one of the cloaked figures notices me. As I hurry away, he mockingly tells me that 'All roads lead to us... All of them.' Which is at least a bit more original than 'There's no escape', 'Resistance is useless' or 'Nowhere to run.'

Four of the figures give chase, but my familiarity with the area provides a slight advantage. Vaulting a fence, I enter a yard in which a hog is sleeping. I could try waking it to surprise my pursuers, but that might backfire: if this not-so-little piggy wakes quickly, it might attack me, delaying me for long enough that the cloaked men can catch up. Better, I think, to let sleeping hogs lie and hope that those who follow me disturb it themselves.

Evidently they don't. As I draw near the market square, I consider my options. Seeking out some of the City Guard probably won't help, and hiding in a stable seems like a good way to get caught, so I'll head for the area known as the Tangles and hope that it's the kind of warren of twisting back streets that the name suggests.

Whether or not I can make it there before someone catches up with me depends on an Endurance check, and either I've already missed an opportunity to increase an Ability or the text is allowing for impossible contingencies, because it implies that my Endurance could be above 4. Mine is definitely lower, so the four men catch up to me.

Surrender could mean game over, so I'll attack in the (probably vain) hope that the desperate situation will unlock some hidden power within me, or I'll attract the attention of some noble rogue who goes around defending underdogs and righting wrongs. Nope, I just take some damage and wind up bound, gagged, and with a sack over my head. My captors take the hatchet but not the locket.

Prodding me with something sharp, one of the men tells me that while their master would prefer me alive, dead is still a viable option, and they will kill me if I try to escape. They bundle me into a cart and start to transport me away. I have no way of knowing where we are until I hear the voice of the city gatekeeper challenging us. Another nudge with the weapon comes as a hint that I would be advised not to try and attract his attention, and I decide not to call the wielder's bluff.

The gatekeeper chats briefly with the cart's driver, mentioning that a group of armed men has been glimpsed in the region. Would they be the men who came for me, or could there be another party roaming around, possibly potential allies?

Once we're on our way again, the man with the weapon removes the sack and gag, allowing me to see that only he and the driver are travelling with me. He is pale, and looks only slightly older than I am, and even though I can now see the weapon with which he threatened me, the text doesn't bother to specify its type, only to point out that it is inscribed with the word 'Flynt'. In a flat voice which could indicate that he's not entirely himself, the man informs me that he's half-Harlan (that's his name, not his nationality), from a fishing village to the north.

I ask about his odd name, and he tells me that 'whole-Harlan was purified', merely repeating that rather ominous phrase when I seek elucidation. The only other available conversational gambit that seems worth taking is to enquire about the reason why I've been captured. Half-Harlan tells me that he was ordered to do it by the Shadow Reaper, and responds to all further questions about said individual with the assertion that 'That is not for me to know'.

The only other information I am able to extract from half-Harlan is that he is taking me to meet 'others' at a nearby bridge. It won't take long to get there, so if I don't want to risk being 'purified' myself I should start thinking about escape.

From somewhere ahead I hear rumblings, clankings, and the sounds of people enjoying themselves. We are close to Gloamwold Forest (which my character knows as a sinister place), and for a while the trees screen the source of the noise from me, but eventually we round a bend and see that a circus troupe is approaching.

The driver of the cart yells at the convoy to get out of the way, addressing them as 'thieving vagabonds' and indicating that their sort are not welcome around here. He quickly changes his tune when the ringmaster summons three of the largest and burliest of his employees. This looks like a good time to abandon cart and call for help, and my attempted escape leads to an Athleticism roll. This goes no better than my previous one, and half-Harlan cuts me on the leg with Flynt as I make my move. Even so, I alert the circus folk to my predicament.

Before they can respond, the sound of galloping hooves indicates the approach of half-Harlan's companions. Half-Harlan leaps after me, the ringmaster urges his associates to help me, and things get a bit chaotic. One of the strongmen picks half-Harlan up and throws him at the rest of my captors, but their leader sorcerously deflects him. Flynt falls at my feet, I grab the weapon, the circus people start fighting the Shadow Reaper's men, and an acrobat severs my bonds and urges me to flee into the forest. I attempt to do as directed, but before I can get to cover, half-Harlan intercepts me and I get to see if the combat system is as bad as it looks.

Fighting involves a combination of dice-rolling and guesswork. Before each round I have to decide how much damage I want to try and inflict: to do 1 point of damage I need to get 7 or above on two dice, but I can increase the damage by 2 or 4 points by adding a similar amount to the target roll. I automatically take damage at the end of every round my opponent survives, and have a time limit in which to win.

This is probably about as easy a fight as I'm ever going to have, as half-Harlan is down to 2 Life, and only does 1 damage per round, but I only have 3 rounds in which to defeat him. Obviously I need only decide whether to try and strike two 1-point blows or one 3-pointer. While going for the easier attacks would guarantee that I'll lose some Life, I think the odds favour doing it that way. Besides, I can always switch to the riskier attack in the third round if unsuccessful in both of the first two.

Two misses later I am indeed forced to take desperate measures, but my third roll is only a 7. Half-Harlan smashes my hand against a rock, forcing me to drop Flynt, and his leader joins us, telling me I am my mother's child before using some arcane power to compel me to sleep.

I wake just in time to meet with an unclear end. I've been bound to a post beside or on a large metal disc with glowing symbols rotating around it. I hear a familiar laugh, something flies at me, and that's it. Maybe I was killed with a projectile weapon, maybe I was 'purified' with some dark enchantment, maybe some malign entity possessed me, maybe I saw the author's cursor just before he hit 'Delete' - I don't know, and the book doesn't specify.

Well, that wasn't the worst gamebook I've ever played. Nor even the worst one I bought in one of those charity shops (on a perverse whim I once picked up an appalling CYOA called Prisoner of the Ant People for 25p in the branch closest to my former place of work). But it wasn't particularly good, either, so I shan't be going out of my way to get hold of any of its successors. 

Are You Sure?! Are You Sure?! Are You Sure?! Are You Sure?! Are You Sure?! Are You Sure?! Are You Sure?! Are You Sure?!

Fighting Fantazine 16's mini-adventure, Sister Angela's Veil, includes material that would probably merit a trigger warning if included in a film or TV series these days, and author Mark Lain has been critical of readers who've expressed objections to that aspect of it, so there could be controversy ahead. That's not a valid reason to skip the adventure, though, so I need to get on with it.

My character would appear to be some kind of religious investigator: at any rate, I have been sent on a mission to find out if there's any truth to the rumours that somebody has stolen a holy relic, the veil of Sister Angela de Culpa, from the Convent of the Nuns of Blessed Relief. Doesn't sound that big a deal, but from playtesting Veil I know that there's a tough fight towards the end, and a couple of places where failing a Luck roll will doom my character, so I shall definitely be allocating stats. Doing so gives me:
Skill 12
Stamina 19
Luck 11
Well, I'm in with a chance, though there's still plenty of potential for going wrong, as it's been years since the playtesting. Both times I played it for challenges at the Fantazine forum, my memory let me down: once I caused a metal statue to animate, and died fighting it, and on the other attempt I took a wrong turning, missed an essential item, and was killed by an undead foe I had no way of harming.

I start the adventure outside the convent, a grim-looking building which nevertheless seems more appealing than its surroundings, as night is falling and the temperature is dropping. A parchment is attached to the doors which are the only way in, but I ignore it. While it's not a death spell, reading it won't help me unless I want to exploit a loophole that my feedback as a playtester inadvertently helped create. So I just knock at the door.

After a short time, a man in monk's garb unlocks the door and motions for me to enter. At this point the text presents me with three possible courses of action, two of them insane (though attacking without provocation is, admittedly, something of a norm for gamebook heroes). Not wanting to get into an unnecessary fight, or to die as a consequence of refusing to enter the place where I'm supposed to be carrying out my mission (as becomes very clear later on, trying to get the reader to steer clear of doing what needs to be done is something of a Lain-ism), I walk inside.

The man relocks the door behind me and invites me to talk with him. I sit on a nearby bench, and he introduces himself as Rosgard, formerly a Templar Warrior, but now Principal Priest of the chapel. He comments that the Sisters don't seem overly keen on his preaching, and that he steers clear of the inner parts of the convent. 

Though (in an arbitrary attempt at misdirection by the author) I get a sinister vibe from Rosgard, I tell him the real reason for my visit. He admits to being dubious about relics, recommends I seek out Father Grandier, and advises me to get some holy water from the font in the north transept, providing a flask in which to carry it.

I do as he suggests. As I turn to leave the font, an elderly Dwarf offers 'a word to the wise', and again I choose conversation rather than psychopathy. The Dwarf reveals that he came here seeking sanctuary from the authorities in Port Blacksand, and warns me to avoid the convent's dortoir.

I could now go over to the altar, but doing so would not benefit me. If I'd murdered Rosgard and stolen his robes, there'd be potential for a mildly humorous incident involving mistaken identity and a hastily improvised sermon, but I went with the path that's more ethical (and avoids combat against an opponent with a double-figure Skill score), so that's not an option for me.

Proceeding towards the interior of the convent, I pass through the south transept, observing a stained glass window that depicts incidents from the life of Sister Angela, and enter a triangular vestibule with a marble floor, and a wooden seat against one wall. Sitting down for a short rest provides a (for me) redundant Stamina bonus, and also enables me to spot a small leather pouch on the floor. Picking up the pouch, I can feel that it contains a bottle or flask (not a flash, which the text still says even though I tried to fix that typo before publication), and remove the vessel for closer inspection. It's a bottle of blue liquid, with a label on which is written a rather awkward verse hinting at the nature of its contents. A test sip confirms that this is a Potion of Invisibility, which I pocket before heading for the exit.

At this point I must Test my Luck (though it's not one of the 'do or die' instances), and I get a favourable outcome, so I don't slip on the floor and break the bottle and flask. Beyond the door is a corridor, with a side opening into an octagonal chapterhouse. Alcoves in its walls contain seats, each with a plaque bearing the name of a senior Priestess, and on the seat with Angela's name there is also a small wooden box, presumably for offerings.

If I remember rightly, investigating the box will cost me Luck but provide something that can avert loss of Luck later on. It's a risk, but one I think could be worth taking, so I take the chance. Something rattles inside the box when I pick it up, and I manage to avoid taking damage from the blade that pops out when I undo the catch to open the box. The golden nugget which the box contains is too light to be real gold, but I take it in case I meet anyone who's both bribeable and gullible.

At the end of the corridor are two doors, and I think choosing the wrong one will mean missing out on a vital clue. There's something sinister afoot, so if I try the appropriate door... I find the library I was hoping to discover. Again the text asks if I want to do something obviously stupid and fail, this time phrasing it as not wanting to waste time, but I wasn't fooled the first time I found this room, and the only reason I ever checked out the 'read nothing' option was because playtesting requires thoroughness.

So, what do I read? There's a half-decent reason given for ignoring most of the tomes in here: they don't have anything written on their spines, so they don't grab my attention in the same way as the few volumes which do give an indication of the nature of their contents.

The book I select has strange black stains on the edges of the pages, and while its original text contains little of relevance (at least unless I want to try selling tales of not-so-devout nuns to the tabloids), notes made in the margins by a previous reader include a reference to 'The Second Of The Two' and a 3-digit number, which just screams 'hidden section reference' at any remotely savvy gamebook reader.

I can't turn my attention to any of the other books, because the lone candle lighting the room has almost burned out. It's time to go, and as I head for the exit, the text makes it clear that, yes, Mark Lain has read and/or watched The Name of the Rose, but the poison on the pages of the book I read is weak, and merely diminishes the effectiveness of the next portion of Provisions I consume.

Following a slightly clumsy check of elapsed time, which gives anyone who chose the wrong door a hint about what they missed, I go through the other door and find myself in a small room containing robes, dresses, and an alabaster mask. Nothing good is to be gained by taking the mask, so I just pass straight through to the cloisters, where a flock of bats swoops to the attack in case prudent players are getting combat withdrawal symptoms. They're pretty flimsy opponents, and I have no trouble disposing of them.

Now I have four doors to choose from. A couple of them have very clear distinguishing features, one of which I remember as indicating somewhere I need to go, but there's a side quest I would benefit from taking first, so I want to try and find the door leading to that. As I recall, it's accessed via the kitchen, and the other distinctive marker on a door isn't particularly kitcheny, so I'll try one of the more nondescript ones.

And that’s the kitchen. No keys being heated on the stove, and there’s a tasty-looking roast duck on the table. Even though I’m at full Stamina, I eat some duck, and find some way of carrying around the rest as an extra portion of Provisions. Searching the kitchen turns up a cleaver, which would make an adequate substitute weapon if I’d read that parchment at the start and obeyed the instruction to leave my sword outside, and a disappointing selection of herbs – no garlic, no Aramance, no wolfsbane, just stuff for seasoning food. I don’t know what the chefs here think they’re doing.

There’s nothing more to do in here, but the exits from the kitchen include a door leading out into a garden, so I go through that. In addition to the inevitable plants, there’s a hut (which I seem to remember contains nothing but trouble) and a path leading away from the building.

Taking a closer look at the plants, I see some carrots, a couple of orchids, a bed of some unidentified herb, and a lot of what looks like grass. I find the orchids beautiful and the smell of the herb off-putting, but then I remember how the text made me unnecessarily suspicious about Rosgard, and decide to investigate the herb more closely in case Mr Lain is being sneaky again. The herb tastes bitter, but I risk consuming a sprig anyway, and it restores some of the Luck lost in earlier Tests.

The orchids are probably trouble, so I now turn my attention to the path. Oh, bother, it’s the bit like an annoying child who won’t stop going, “Are we nearly there yet?” during a long journey. Only here the text is padded with way too many variations on ‘Do you want to turn back now?’

So, I proceed into a more unkempt part of the garden (no, keep going), finding it hard to see what’s up ahead (no, carry on). Overhanging branches scratch my face, and the foliage becomes thick enough that I need to hack my way through with my sword (okay, this is a legitimate spot for a 'turn back' option). As soon as I draw a weapon, the verdant mass blocking my way shrinks back, which is a little disconcerting, but I don't delay in case the plants are mustering their forces in preparation to attack.

The path terminates at the door of a building with a fresh-looking inscription that reads 'Cellarium' (yes, I want to take a look inside rather than turning back after all that effort). The door opens easily enough to suggest that it gets used regularly, and I see steps leading down into darkness (of course I'm going to descend them). While the lack of dust and cobwebs also indicates that this place is far from abandoned, an unpleasant smell drifts up from below (no, that is not going to discourage me from investigating). Before descending, I eat the rest of that duck to make good the minor Stamina loss incurred passing through the garden (and to get out of the way the reduced Stamina gain associated with that weak poison). 

At the bottom of the stairs is a more neglected-looking passageway: though there is a convenient lit torch illuminating it, dust covers the floor, and I see the tracks of rats. The corridor leads to a door which has a cross nailed to it, and someone has chalked the words 'REMAIN WITHIN, ALL THAT IS CORRUPT' below. Finally conceding that any reader who's come this far isn't about to be dissuaded by such hints that there may be something nasty ahead, Mr Lain doesn't give a retreat option this time, though there's still a section transition before we get to find out what lurks behind the door.

It's a torchlit burial chamber, containing a coffin on a plinth. And an undead Tomb Guardian, which calls me a defiler and attacks me with a rusty broadsword. I could try using the holy water to destroy it, but between the Skill advantage I have and the fact that I'd have to spend a point of Luck to throw the contents of the flask, I think I'll just fight the thing normally.

The Guardian wounds me once in the course of the fight, but that's no big deal. Less positively, the annoying padding is back. Apart from dust, the chamber contains only the coffin (yes, I want to take a closer look at it). A plaque identifies the occupant as Sister Angela (of course I want to see what's inside), but all I find in it is a stone warhammer. There's no new section to turn to if I want to take the weapon, but I still have the option to leave it behind in case I want to have wasted my time and the Stamina I lost in the fight.

Heading back up the stairs with my new acquisition, I leave the cellarium and start to retrace my steps through the garden. Now the animated plant life attacks me, but I fight off the Bush-being without taking any damage and hurry back to what the text oddly describes as the 'relative' safety of the kitchen. I'd be hard pressed to find a less dangerous kitchen than this one in all FF, so there was really no need for the qualifier.

Once back in the kitchen, I don't loiter. Returning to the cloister is not an option, so I must choose between the door with a cross nailed to it and the one with no distinguishing features. I try the door with the cross on, which leads into an unoccupied refectory. The only thing of note in here is another potential replacement weapon for anyone who's currently unarmed.

The only door from here that doesn't lead to somewhere I've already been has the letter 'W' painted on it. Probably short for 'Washroom', considering the large bath in the room beyond. Clouds of warm steam, and the sight of a hand (not severed) gripping the side of the bath, indicate that the room is currently in use.

Luck determines what happens next, and I only just succeed at the roll: if I'd used the holy water on the Tomb Guardian, I'd have no chance of beating the adventure on this occasion. But I was Lucky, so the occupant of the bath is still alive. He speaks, asking who has come to disturb him, so I tell him I need assistance. Introducing himself as Grandier, Grand Abbot, the bather says that he is hungry, and will tell me what I need to know in return for food.

I hand over a portion of Provisions, and after wolfing it down, Grandier opens a concealed hidey-hole in the side of the bath, removes a scroll, and hands it to me, explaining that this is Sister Angela's confession. She's not dead, and there never was a veil (other than the veil of lies concealing her continued existence). Everything that is wrong with the convent has its source in her, but confronting her with the confession may put an end to the corruption.

Taking the scroll (and with it a Luck bonus that brings me back up to maximum), I leave by the door leading to the inner sanctum. The décor is fancier here. At the end of the corridor is another door, and just before it a side passage leads off to the left. Vague memories of how I last failed this adventure suggest that this is a slightly devious bit of design: 'ahead'  tends to denote progress, while side turnings are often associated with optional (but sometimes essential) side quests, but here I think the left turn leads to the next stage of the adventure, and I need to go through the door first if I want another vital clue.

As I approach the door, it opens to reveal a Calacorm - a two-headed lizard of a type that I've encountered in a couple of FF books before now - wearing a tunic with a big '1' on it. Calacorms are often employed as gaolers, and the dank air wafting out from behind this one suggests that I may have found a cell. Then again, the tunic could indicate that he's a goalkeeper, and the smell be a hint that this is the convent team's changing room.

Remembering that fighting and killing the Calacorm would get me hit with a Luck penalty for murdering a mildly intelligent being who's just doing his job (never mind that another section implies that his job involves torturing defenceless prisoners), I get him out of the way by offering that nugget of fool's gold as a bribe. He grabs it and runs off to the washroom, leaving me free to go through the door he was guarding (or ignore it now it's accessible and take that side turning, because gamebook readers should always be given the chance to reconsider if they're on the verge of doing something right, right?).

Beyond the door is the convent's misericord, and while in the real world such rooms were places in monasteries where the rules were relaxed slightly, here it's basically a torture chamber for punishing errant members of the order. Its current occupant is a woman in shackles, stripped to the waist (but facing away from me so the scene can be illustrated without making the 'zine adults only - though the picture does not show the post to which the text says she is chained, but has her bonds connected to the walls), with welts on her back.

Mistaking me for her tormentor, the woman begs me not to flog her again, so I explain that I mean her no harm, and she asks me to free her. I break her bonds, and she explains why she's here. A Templar got her pregnant and, accusing her of blasphemy, had the baby taken from her after she gave birth. She attempted to get her son back, but was caught and imprisoned here. Her torturer's taunts have indicated to her that the infant is being kept in a room with the number 1 on the door, and prior to her capture she learned the combination to its lock from a Dwarven pilgrim. No longer in a fit state to try and escape, she tells me the combination so I can seek the child.

I give her some of my Provisions, and she indicates that the side passage I passed on the way to the misericord leads to the room where her baby is being kept. She then heads off to the bathhouse while I proceed the other way.

Whereas the corridor from the bathhouse to the misericord had plush carpeting, the floor here is metal. Around a corner is a small chamber, in which a life-sized metal statue of a warrior stands on the floor. Dare I risk the expenditure of Luck that trying to sneak past the statue is likely to entail, or should I try to deliberately animate it and hope that my high Skill will enable me to prevail where once I was beaten to a pulp?

Taking a closer look at the statue, I observe that part of its chest can open up. Undoing the catch, I look inside and see two buttons, one blue, the other brown. Hazy, decades-old memories from Physics classes suggest that those are two of the colours found on the wiring in British electrical plugs, and a quick check online confirms it. 

I press the button that doesn't match that of the live wire, and the statue activates. Its eyes open to emit a dazzling light, hitting me with an Attack Strength penalty, but I still have a narrow lead. Even so, the Metal Warrior strikes the first blow, but after that I get lucky: not only do I narrowly win the second round, but I roll a double when generating my Attack Strength, and the combination of those two factors has me deliver so powerful a blow that the statue falls over, breaking the circuit that enabled it to draw power through the contact of its soles with the metal floor. Instant victory for me.

Continuing on my way, I eventually reach two numbered doors. I turn my attention to door 1, which has a mechanical combination lock, and input the number I learned in the misericord. The door opens, and the air in the room beyond has a slight smell of ammonia. Entering, I see a wicker basket on the floor and a cross on the wall.

Disregarding the opportunity to just leave the room (and thus ensure failure), I approach the basket, which starts to move as if containing something alive (no, I still don't want to exit the room and doom myself, thanks very much). Looking into the basket, I see a sleeping baby.

Here we reach the controversial element of the adventure: the text gives me the option of killing the infant (and doing so with the correct implement is commended and rewarded). Readers have objected to this, and the author has objected to their objections and responded with arguments which convinced me that he cannot justify it and would have been better off not trying. 

Now, having had to play through every possible course of action in Sister Angela's Veil as a playtester, I am well aware that this is not the child of the woman I rescued, but is actually a disguised monster, and the safest course of action at this stage is to smite it with the warhammer. But there are no clues - indeed, all the information provided to the reader prior to this encounter points towards this being a real baby. Even the unpleasant smell is redolent of dirty nappies rather than supernatural evil. 

While acting on metaknowledge gained during previous attempts is pretty much inevitable when replaying gamebooks, that's not a good excuse for making it necessary (or even just advisable) to perform actions that are irrational or abhorrent. And no, 'other authors allowed or encouraged the readers to do bad things first' is not a valid excuse, either. Those earlier (and generally nowhere as extreme) instances have come in for plenty of criticism too.

Way too late for me to have included it in my playtester's comments, I did have an idea for an option other than 'endanger yourself' and 'act like a homicidal maniac'. If a player who'd acquired the holy water and got this far without using it were given the opportunity to pronounce a blessing over the presumed child, that could provide a low-risk and character-appropriate way of exposing the true nature of the beast. Regrettably, it didn't occur to me until some time after publication.

Anyway, I crush the monster and (after disregarding the inevitable 'leave before you can find the only thing that justifies coming here in the first place' option) go on to discover that the cross on the wall is actually a magic sword. There's really no reason why the reader shouldn't have been able to ignore the supposed child and look at the cross, thereby gaining the essential weapon without the contrived moral dilemma (maybe with a Test your Luck to avoid falling victim to a sneak attack while turned away from the room's occupant), but that's not how this mini-adventure rolls.

There's nothing else of interest in room 1, so I go back out and check out the other door, which also has a combination lock. This one opens when I try the number I found noted in that library book, revealing an apparently empty room with two damp-looking stone walls and one brick wall that looks as if it was put up comparatively recently. As I recall, it was at this door that I failed my very first attempt at the adventure, having missed the library and thus not found the combination, which somehow led my character to the conclusion that giving up on the mission and leaving the convent was the only acceptable course of action. Not sure what was preventing me from going back and searching more thoroughly - similar endings in older FF books would have things like an immovable portcullis or a room full of malicious entities to explain why being thwarted by a lock meant that my adventure ended there - especially as, having previously been knocked out and taken to the misericord while unconscious, I had no idea of the way out, and was going to have to search for that anyway.

Incidentally, if you were to go up to door 2 and use the combination for door 1, you would just be let into the room behind door 1 (and vice versa). Some might consider this to be a mistake, or at least a bit sloppy, but the same kind of thing can be found in a few of Ian Livingstone's books, so Lainian argumentation would doubtless cite those instances as a rebuttal.

Taking a closer look at the brick wall, I see that the mortar is in a pretty poor state, and it would be easy to remove enough bricks to create a way through. After making a decent-sized hole in the wall, I climb through, and am attacked by the animated corpse of a Priestess (whose appearance in the illustration doesn't really match the one given in the text). This Wight-Priestess can only be harmed by magical weapons (and a bit of editorial oddness has gone on here: the section to which you may only turn if you have a magic sword has gained a sentence telling players who lack a magic sword that they're doomed).

Even with the Attack Strength bonus provided by the magic sword, I lose a few rounds of the fight. Still, the Wight-Priestess loses more, so I survive the battle. The body crumbles to dust, and I notice a large mirror against one of the walls and decide to smash it (acting more on metaknowledge than any real logic, but this is small potatoes compared to the last thing I did with that hammer). And despite a certain playtester's having pointed out that any player who lacks a magic sword will have been killed by the Wight-Priestess before they could get this far, the text still says '(if you have one)' when including a sword in the list of things with which the mirror could be struck.

In any case, I hit the mirror with the hammer, and everything goes weird for a bit. The next thing I know, I'm on the floor of a sumptuously decorated bedchamber. Seated on a throne beside a table with golden goblets on it is an elderly lady. She wears the gown of a Priestess and some expensive-looking jewellery, and beckons me over. I ask who she is, and she reproves me for my lack of trust and introduces herself as Sister Amandla.

Again she invites me to join her and, because the text indicates that now would be a good time, I accuse her of being a fibber, and reach into my pack for the scroll that Grandier gave to me. The Priestess is enraged, and demands that I give her the scroll, and again I succeed at a crucial Luck roll by the narrowest of margins. Though my head hurts from the sound of her unnaturally amplified voice, I am still able to open the scroll and read out its contents. It's essentially a contract granting her eternal life, which can only be rendered null and void by telling her it's not true. As loopholes go, that's a pretty big one, and reading out the 'confession' is enough to cause her to age centuries in seconds, decaying until nothing remains but her gown.

So, while the relic I came here to investigate didn't exist, it is now true that all that remains of Sister Angela is the veil that lies on the floor. There are still a few issues, what with Angela having been evil rather than saintly, and responsible for corruption instead of miracles, but I'm sure some people would prefer to stick with the myth rather than the reality for the sake of the money that can be gained from gullible pilgrims. Deception and exploitation have featured prominently in the trade of relics and associated abuses in the real world, too. But precedent and justification are by no means the same thing, and if my character has any say in the matter, the veneration of Sister Angela will cease as soon as I report back to my superiors. However, that is beyond the scope of this adventure, which ends with me anticipating a good night's rest in the comfy bed that Sister Angela no longer requires.

The Embarrassing Early Works That You'd Rather Forget About

Apologies that this blog has been quiet for a few months. The next title I shall be playing here contains a controversial element, and the author has not handled criticism of it well in the past, which has been proving something of an obstacle to getting motivated to get back into it.

In the course of some decluttering at home I recently rediscovered an incomplete amateur gamebook that I wrote during my teens. Not sure exactly when, but in-jokey references to reading Trial of Champions suggest 1986. Looking back through the existing material (around a quarter of what was planned), I have to wonder how I ever came up with such nonsense. It involves a modern-day sorcerer investigating the actions of an individual (ultimately revealed to be named Elric Zaiphrex, and yes, on at least one route through the book it would have been necessary to convert his name into a number via the A=1, B=2 etc system) who's been transforming random bystanders into statues, before becoming involved in an attempt to establish a colony on another planet.

Incoherent as the narrative may sound, the material I wrote is even more muddled. Having chosen to write the sections in numerical order rather than following the sequence of events, and only having reached section 97 (of a planned 400) before getting permanently distracted from it, I have a scattershot selection of fragments of different set pieces, including random incidents of vigilantism, a meeting with the Prime Minister, and assorted perils encountered in an alien maze that I shoehorned in towards the end of the adventure to bring the section count up to the target number.

Mind you, the last of those did lead to what must be my favourite line in the whole text: a surprisingly bland description of the player character falling into a pool of acid and dying concludes with the statement, "Your last thought is that you should never have threatened the apes." The way things have been going of late, I needed a good laugh, and that phrase certainly provided one.